CMI: Barriers & Conclusions
Barriers to Game Planning
The Game Planning technique requires openness and honesty. Comfort between the facilitator and participant is only one barrier to overcome. Because of the nature of the process, the facilitator must possess an ability to “see through” polite answers to questions, and solicit answers that the participant may not have realized.
Why would a participant give polite answers or say things he/she thinks the facilitator would want to hear especially when the facilitator is a spouse? We have identified three reasons addressed by the Game Planning process. Other reasons surely exist, but the following three reasons are considered most challenging to the process. They are Noble Pursuit Requirement, Reasonable Requirement, and Altruistic Requirement. Overcoming these is a search for the internal drive, the basic motivation or personal need in choosing an activity or career. For example, “I want to help people,” if probed to discover basic motivation may become, “I need to be needed.”
Marriage and the process of blending with another person do not have to mean losing oneself. Marriage has elements of partnership. The key is for each partner to know him/herself—drives, motives, goals. There are many barriers to work through when the self is examined. It is hard to be intuitive about what is standing between you and success. Some may even ask the question, who will support me in living out my passion? That is why the COACH Marital Intervention with the use of Game Planning works. It allows a couple to open up to one another, overcome their fears and have the ultimate support from that trusted someone.
The COACH Marital Intervention (CMI) is a purposeful interaction, and structured enough to communicate genuineness and commonality of purpose. The technique is formal enough to be consistent and goal-oriented. It contributes gains to each individual in the couple, and offers opportunities for the couple to work together on projects that demonstrate how the individual contributions complement each other. Research using the intervention can focus on Marriage Repair and Pre-Marriage Compatibility.